Good grief!

This is a blog which has taken me years to write... Grief! Wikipedia defines grief as: "Grief is the response to loss, particularly to the loss of someone or some living thing that has died, to which a bond or affection was formed. Although conventionally focused on the emotional response to loss, grief also has physical, cognitive, behavioral, social, cultural, spiritual and philosophical dimensions. While the terms are often used interchangeably, bereavement refers to the state of loss, while grief is the reaction to that loss.

The grief associated with death is familiar to most people, but individuals grieve in connection with a variety of losses throughout their lives, such as unemployment, ill health or the end of a relationship.[2] Loss can be categorized as either physical or abstract;[3] physical loss is related to something that the individual can touch or measure, such as losing a spouse through death, while other types of loss are more abstract, possibly relating to aspects of a person's social interactions.[4]" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grief It affects us all and for many reasons.

Some of those reasons could be:

Loss of someone or animal Runaways Loss of a long term job or working life (retirement) A change in life or relationship circumstances Loss of freedom (this can be many things) Empty nest syndrome Our youthful years Loss of health temporary / longer term or living with permanent changes (menopause, cancer, , limb removal, dementia, mental health and so many other conditions.)

Keith was my partner of 17years and he died suddenly in 2017. It took me nearly 4 years to come to terms with losing him, the circumstances surrounding his death, caring for him prior to his death (which was not related to his death), his grief over losing his mum and supporting our daughter through her grief of losing her dad.

It happened 5 weeks after we moved from Essex to Wales and me and our daughter barely knew anybody. It was supposed to be his retirement phase, a time of relaxation and pursuing what he enjoyed. His later working life was hit and miss through illness and this was a process of grief he went through for a long time. Not only were we grieving our old life but now Keith's death and our old life.

I had to put my own grief on hold for a while until everything else got sorted including my health, supporting my daughter who was 15years old at the time and our cat who was grieving (Yes animals grieve!)

It was a stressful time all round and I will never be the same person as I was when he was alive. A change is not always as good as a rest but from it, new opportunities can arise (eventually) after a period of healing. That's what I discovered through my own journey.

I don't just get it, I've walked it (most of us will - We aint getting out alive!) and I can seriously empathise with most people. I have since relocated away and grieved for a short while about leaving Keith behind in Wales and now I am grieving over leaving one phase of life for another (menopause). All the time knowing, it's a new adventure, new opportunities and a whole new journey! I'm laughing now.. These things we ALL go through, thousands, millions of people endure grief everyday including those who went before us and still it is so bloody painful and very much a personal journey. Yet no one knows the secret or cure for it and would we want it? Would we want to stop feeling because it's painful or do we continue to endure knowing it's part of the life process (not just human) and to love is to feel pain? Does it make us feel more alive? Who knows... Life is FULL of irony!

The space I provide people when offering treatment, can go beyond the treatment itself.

It's a an hour or more which offers peace, a much needed nap, the chance to offload anything bothersome - Sometimes someone outside the familiar circle of family/friends/co-workers can offer a new perspective or I just simply listen and not say a word. I do not just work on the physical aspects of a person but the emotional and energy nature too. My nature is to always to strive to help someone.

For the duration of a session, music is also played which helps people listen and focus on the present moment as the treatment begins to help them "let go" for a while. This session time provides the space for the body to do what it does best (within its own capabilities) and respond to treatment. It starts a healing / balancing process away from the stress experienced and supports people through any grieving process, however long it takes. As always, I send love to you...